Mr Grumpy

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By Mr Grumpy - Thu 19th Jan 2012

 

The high number of 'Spanglish' relationships going on here in Spain has been intriguing me for a while.

I have a few friends and acquaintances in the British geezer / Spanish Chica situation, but hardly any at all in the Spanish Hombre / British Bird opposite category, and wondered if this was simply a coincidence, or if there was a specific reason as to why this may be. Or at least in my area of Spain.

Is there some kind of prestige or mystique in dating somebody from a different country ? Is it really more exotic to date somebody from another culture ? Is it really that hard work to be married to someone who speaks a different language ? Can you really get away with pretending that you simply 'don't understand' the middle of heated argument ? Shall I stop rattling on and get on with the Blog ?

Of course, I do know that the Spanish Hombre / British Bird relationship does exist here in Spain from reading Mo's Spainstruck Blog.

Except in her case would probably be Scottish Lassie. Better get that straight at this point...

I also know that there is a massive contingent of North American / Spanish co-habiting shenanigans going on in Spain too (... Sound of gauntlet being thrown down to Not Hemmingway's Spain), but as I have zero experience of that it would be perhaps be best left alone for somebody else to blog about.

Anyway, so I spoke with one of My Spanish Amigas about the difference that she noticed between dating Spanish and British men, and asked Mo the same question with regards to her sitaution. Call it some kind of social experiment if you like.... [Panorama Executive Producers can reach me via the comments box at the foot of the page].

Spanish Men versus British Men

From asking my Spanish friend the differences (Note I didn't say 'benefits'...) she noticed about dating British Men as opposed to Spanish men, she had the following to tell me (her words and observations, not mine...)

- British men can and will cook. Spanish men will cook, but only as long as it is a barbeque or a Paella (must be something about the outdoors ?). After around 30 years of marriage a Spanish Husband 'might' agree that his wife cooks almost as good as his Mother.

- Cleaning and Ironing is Woman's work. Spanish men will rarely help around the house and not even know what an iron is, or where it is kept, but often have a spotless car. A British guy may ‘occasionally’ help out.

- With a Spanish guy friends always come first, so a girl needs to be ready for constant late arrivals due to their boyfriend was having a drink, or two and then moving on to another bar and losing track of time .... Although they are sometimes considerate enough to bring you churros for breakfast at 8am in the morning on their way home.

- Flowers ? - If they ever bring their girlfriend flowers they usually either have one thing on their mind or they feel guilty about something (then again, in my experience that is often the case with men the world over !)

- As far as friendship is concerned, British men seem (reasonably) happy for their girlfriend to have other male friends or work colleagues and some independence. As far as most Spanish men are concerned if you have just one male acquaintance, then you are sleeping with him - the concept of JUST friendship between a man and a woman hasn’t reached this country yet.

Of course, I attempted to wrench the rose-tinted spectacles from her face and remind her that she hadn't actually dated a Spanish man for some time and that things may have moved on over the last decade that she had been ‘off the shelf’. Ditto, the fact that all the Spanish men she had dated were of a similar age to herself - which, at that time would have been early 20's - surely it would be unfair to tar all Spanish men (and British men) of all ages with the same brush ?

So come on Spainstruck - set the record straight....!