Mr Grumpy

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By Mr Grumpy - Wed 9th May 2012

 

Every Village throughout the world has it’s idiot, that is a fact that has been undisputed for generations.

My village, of less than 700 residents, is in the enviable position of having two of them.

However, what causes me concern is that fact that both of them are the two local village Policemen.

My lack of respect for the ’Policia Local’ has been documented before. Why for the life in me, a man with a gun, handcuffs and mace spray is required for the arduous task of handing out parking tickets (or in most cases turning a blind eye to parking infractions), help children cross the road and man the front desk at the town hall is beyond me....

A few years ago the elder of the two local coppers, who was well known in the village for liking the odd tipple, was given a final reprimand by the Alcalde. It seems that one evening after work he enjoyed a few beers too many at the local bar and ended the evening by letting off a few rounds with his handgun.

It was disturbing to hear that this wasn’t actually the first time that he had done this, after which he was given a slap on the wrist, but after this second time he was dealt with more harshly.

His ammunition was confiscated.

Yep, how on earth can a lollipop lady be expected to function properly in a village of around 700 people if they are not armed to the teeth ?

However, the younger of the two idiots surpassed himself this week.

On my way taking my daughter to school said Policeman stopped the flow of traffic to allow a stream of school children to cross the road. Nothing wrong there, quite commendable if anything.

But when the car behind me started peeping it’s horn, Sr Policia became flustered and waved me on. This I ignored, which angered the car behind me all the more and caused him to peep even more incessantly. Sr Policia continued to wave at me all the more determinedly – gesturing to me to get a move on and stop holding the road up.

Naturally, I was reluctant to do so given there was still a stream of kids crossing the road.

I don’t know which angered me more : The car behind me, which could clearly see the kids trying to make their way to school, or the Policeman given the solitary and highly taxing job of holding the traffic up, who couldn’t even manage that one demanding job.

If I had obeyed his instruction and ploughed my way through the kids I wonder who would legally have been at fault .... ?